Walk While Reading

Book Review

1Q84 by Haruki Murakami

I don’t feel entirely comfortable writing unfavorably about an art form I have so much respect for. Writing, and producing fiction stories is something I hold in high regard. But when you’re an author like Haruki Murakami, and you’ve published a novel of 926 pages, at a price tag of over 30 dollars, the reader must demand a return on the investment. 1Q84 is not only a waste of money, it’s a waste of time, for every sentence spent reading it.

Harsh words for an author I use to admire. I no longer do and may never read another word he writes. That sentence is even harsher (I don’t even know if harsher is a word) but I can’t help it, I will not hold back. Writing words like this for an author beloved by millions is not going to gain me many points. I understand that. But I also know, I’m no average reader. I read books every day. I read constantly, I don’t stop reading. I feel like I know what a good and bad book is, and 1Q84 is deplorable. 

I’ve heard the words ‘love story’ used to describe this novel. That is complete bullshit, and if you fall into believing this novel is a love story you’re delusional. Here’s why. Aomame and Tengo fall in love in grade school when they hold hands. After they hold hands they do not see each other for twenty years. They hold hands for a moment. They hold hands!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is all, their love for each other becomes eternal. Murakami, must think I’m stupid, because this is the plot device he uses to keep us reading for almost 800 pages. Unfortunately I was stupid. I should have never picked this book up. I should have never spent a dime on this novel. Why did I read 926 pages and finish 1Q84, because it took me 500 pages to realize I was being duped and being that far into a novel I couldn’t not finish it. But everyday I picked it up, I wished I was reading something else, or doing laundry.

There’s so much wrong with this novel I can go on forever. Murakami repeats himself every third page. He’ll write about how badly someone needs to go pee. Then he’ll describe that person going pee. Then three pages after that he’ll tell you how that person felt when then finally went pee. Then four pages after that the person who went pee, will wake up remember he peed in a bucket and he should flush the bucket of pee down the toilet, because when he went pee earlier, the water in the apartment was turned off. If you think I’m joking I’m not. 

Murakami you really let me down. Nine hundred plus pages is a huge investment in time. I should have been enjoying the reading experience, instead I fantasied about jumping into your novel and kicking the shit out of both your main characters. Because this is all your fault and you should be ashamed of yourself. Oh and one last thing, Murakami, I now hate looking at the moon, thanks a lot.